Only one more to go, I think, maybe.

I PROMISE, I'll be done soon with our trip pictures and stories. 

My Island Boyfriend, Max. It all started with "Hello".

He was such a flirt, a moody flirt that is. Sometimes he wouldn't acknowledge my presence and other times he wanted me to scratch the top of his head. It was short lived fling and it was Oh, so nice.

Quotes
"Always bring more underwear than you think you're going to need".

M, in the airport, carrying one bag - "I'm so glad I have an ass".
LT, carrying 4 bags, - "You calling me a dumb ass"?
M - "No, you're the smart one, I'm the funny one".
LT - "You calling me a smart ass"? 
M - "That shouldn't surprise you".


Here are our bags for the WEEK long trip. Can you guess which one is mine and which one is his? 

The highlights of the trip were the two dives we did Saturday afternoon. They were Shark Adventure dives. On the first dive, we saw some huge stingrays, and the largest loggerhead turtle I've ever seen. The second dive was, by far, what made my entire trip worth it, the feeding of the sharks. I got knocked in the back and a fin hit my regulator twice. The dive master held their dorsal fin and tickled under their nose to mellow them out. He knew I was really excited to be on the trip, so he brought one over to me and had me pet the fin and his tail. WOW! It was SO COOL!!! I was in heaven. The 4 other dives we did later in the week were really boring compared to this one. I really can't express how thrilling it was to be surrounded by 30 sharks. Wow, wow, wow. I can't stop thinking about it. On a side note, I was the only girl on the tour. 

You can see 2 sharks in the water here.

There are cannibal birds on the island. LT and I were both entertained and disgusted to see birds on the beach eating chicken bones. The three birds in this first picture were trying to get the bone from the other bird. GROSS!!!

This is the guest bathroom at our hotel. I've seen mirrors like this before. See, I go on and on forever. (There are some irreverent comments I want to make, about this picture, but I won't).

 Most of the bathrooms, aside from the ones on Paradise Island, were itty bitty. This one was clearly made for people without legs. I think there is less than 24 inches from the lip of the bowl to the wall.

Island coconut!!! 

Some details and other stuff

Food in Nassau, New Providence

EVERYTHING in this city is FRIED. 

I renewed my love affair with fries. It was a fast and furious romance that I had to end our last day there.

Twin Brothers is a popular place and our driver recommended it, so we ate there. They served a pint of oil with their fried dishes. 

Recipe for smelling like onions for 24 hours, more commonly known as the recipe for,

Conch Salad

1 whole onion

1/2 sweet pepper

1/3 pineapple

1 tomato

1/2 mango

1 small raw conch

Coarsely chop all of the above, add lime juice and a touch of orange juice.

Eat and smell like onions for 24 hours

The locals told us, multiple times, Conch is an aphrodisiac. They were quite proud of it.

My favorite place to eat was this little "gem" right around the corner of us. A lot of locals ate there, so we thought we should try it. Their grilled chicken salad was divine. My favorite parts of this picture are, the ENT  RANCE, and the sign with the dude on a skateboard, curly-toed boots, a crown on his head and  huge conch shell in his hand.

Signs

Whenever I see a funny sign, I HAVE to take a picture.

This store CLEARLY has commitment issues.

Don't worry about getting a new sign if you stop selling a certain item, 

just duct tape over it.

Creepy Statues

If you ever lose a baby in Nassau, you don't have to worry. They will probably be found by one of these creatures. 

So, what do you think they are doing with the babies?

A. Infant Massage

B. Stealing it for an island ritual

C. Keeping it safe until you return

D. Scaring the HELL out of it

O Speaks

M - "What was your favorite part of today"?

O - "Daddy left"!

M - "What?!?! Why is that your favorite part"?

O - "Because then we can have a girls night".

Quotes

M - "People are coming over this Saturday so the house needs to be really clean".

LT - "Olivia, we can flush your hair down the toilet". (I don't know where that came from).

M - "Yes, to help clean the toilet".

LT - "It's called a swirly".

M - "My brother had me do it twice, because the first time it didn't work".

LT - "Della got a new hairdo".

M - "Ya, she got bangs, and a new color".

O - "Did she get it from a swirly"?

O, at dinner - "Let's have some squash".

LT - "Okay, sit on the sofa and I'll squash you".

O - "Dad, you need singing lessons".

M - "Olivia, that's not very nice".

O - "It's okay, he's got thick skin."

"She is on what is called "Home Hospitalization" which is a hybrid condition most comparable to a mix between House Arrest and Work Release." Scott S. talking about his wife's progress with her cancer treatment.

LT - "I really need to get other games on my PC besides 12 Dancing Princess's".

At the grocery store in Nassau an item we purchased was a gallon of water. The checker was about to put it in a bag,

M - "It's okay, I don't need a bag for that".

C - "Really"?

M - "Ya, I can just carry it".

C - "Are you sure"?

M - "Ya, Is that weird"?

C - "Yeeeeeeeeees"!

Boob Talk

O doesn't have boobies yet, we call them nubbies. 

O, getting ready to get in the shower, "Look mom, look what happens when I get cold. Touch it".

M - "No thank you, I don't want to touch it".

O - "It gets a little bumpy thing".

M, in Nassau - "I haven't worn a bra all day, and it feels awesome"!

LT - "I haven't worn a bra all day and it feels..."

M - "Normal? Then again, I don't know what you Navy guys do when you get to work".

LT - "There is a reason why we don't talk about it.".

Details to follow

Day 1

We made it on the plane.

This is a really charming hotel.

Wow, we are right downtown.

Day 2

I think I slept on a yoga mat, that bed is hard.

GINGER AT THE BEACH!!!

There is nothing wrong with applying sunscreen with a butter knife.

It's nice to spend time with that one guy I live with, what's his name again?

Day 3

I'm still recovering from jet lag. :)

SHARKS!! 

I thought I was dreaming, but it was real life. 

Day 4

I'm still not over the euphoria of my shark dive.

Let's explore, take pictures and watch people worship.

There are some crazy statues outside the art museum.

Day 5

Arrrrgh, let's explore the pirate museum.

Let's walk to cable beach.

Let's turn around because the sidewalk on both sides of the street ends.

Let's take a tour of the fort on the way home.

Day 6

4 Scuba dives, no sharks.

Day 7

Let's walk 10 miles to eat food and go to a beach.

Yum, that water is nice and warm.

One day left, we need to buy T-shirts.

Day 8

Wow, it's time to head home. 

Let's go to the Straw Market.

A little preview, and then some.

LT and I prematurely celebrated our anniversary with a nice, long trip. I know our anniversary is in May, but hey, why not celebrate it now? (Besides, we are terrible with remembering important dates and it is usually the day of or the day after that we remember. Unless we make a point of doing something, things just come and go).

We didn't tell too many people we were leaving. I still posted on FB and even updated my blog to make it appear that life was the same as always. (I had to be on the internet everyday anyway).

So, where did we go? 

Here are some clues.

The Flag looks like this.

One building looks like this.

The water looks like this.

The sand looks like this.

On the Nightstand

The Invention of Wings by Sue Monk Kidd

I finished and I liked it. It wasn't anything like her other novels, at least the ones I've read. I loved the beautiful way she contrasted and compared the lives of the main characters. (I'm not going to give anything away). I recommend it to anyone who likes to read about finding self and pushing against societies expectations. 

The Well of Ascension, by Brandon Sanderson

I'm only a third of the way through it and it's a lot of work. LT says it's worth it and to keep going. I hate leaving stories unfinished, so, I'll keep slogging along.  

Quotes

"I should have been a cowboy, if I can get a one-year-old dressed for a wedding, I KNOW I could have herded cats". Eric Forrest

Another one down

I spent time with Baby William recently and I felt like I was cheating on Sweet Baby Alice. 

O was holding Sweet Baby Alice and I told her, "You are so good at this, you're a natural". She asked why and I said it's because she's a baby whisperer. After that, she looked at Alice and Alice smiled back. O told me, "I just looked at her and told her to smile". She was so proud of her baby whispering skills.

O Speaks

I'm going to write a book called When My Life Was Cool and the first chapter will be "What Is Not Cool". And, I'm going to be really, really famous and people will want me to sign their copy.

No kablamo = No problemo

O was out of school for a few days because she'd had a fever.

M - "Do you miss being at school"?

O - "No".

M - "Really, why"?

O - "Because Liam K picks his nose, puts his hands in his mouth and puts his hands on the carpet." 

"You're the nicest mom in the world. I imagine you helping the crickets crick".

LT - "It's okay, I have pretty thick skin".

O - runs over and pinches his wrist, and confused says, "Daddy, you don't have thick skin".

On The Nightstand

Mistborn by Brandon Sanderson. SPOILER ALERT!!

I finished it and it was good. It felt a bit slow but it IS a trilogy, so the author can take time for character development. However, one thing that really impressed me was, a main character was killed at the end of the book. I think the sign of a skilled writer is their ability to create a character that plays a huge part of the story and is able to kill them and the story continues and is just as good. J.K. Rowling could do that and Stephanie Meyer couldn't.... hum... 

The Invention of Wings by Sue Monk Kidd

It looks promising and I think it will be a quick read. I LOVED The Secret Life of Bees. I read it twice, which is saying something. Her follow up novel, The Mermaid Chair,  was HORRIBLE!!

SPOILER: It was the same story plot/formula, but with different names and a slightly different story. The main character had the same issue, there was a childhood accident and they thought it was their fault. There was a character with special needs. Plus, I wasn't keen on the adulterous relationship between a Monk and the main character. They were using each other to deal with crap from their past. I can't say enough about how horrible it was. BUT, the description for this new book looks promising and it doesn't look to be the same story being told a third time.

LT talked me into "letting" him read Divergent while I finish up the Mistborn series. I hope he reads fast.

Work

Well, I had quite the day not too long ago. I was all over the place, it was fun. Originally, I was told I was going to be at school all day covering for someone in either 3rd or 4th grade. When I arrived, I was told I was filling in for the 7th grade TA for the morning. I thought, "Middle school, cool". 

The first class was a MATH class. BAHHHHH!! NO!! Whenever LT starts talking about math, my eyes glaze over the same way his eyes do when I talk about music. I was not feeling so confident. Mr. T had me go from group to group and ask them about their thinking process and how they came to their conclusions. It was not bad at all. 

In Humanities, the class watched a cartoon version of A Midsummers Night's Dream. I accidentally laughed out loud, my actual, laugh out loud laugh. Oops. It was hard, so hard, to keep from giggling, the cartoon really caught me off guard a time or two. 

The last class I had was a keyboarding class and I was in charge of it, meaning, I was the "teacher". Ms B. left instructions for them to do work on a website to practice. Most of them did, some of them didn't. I had to make a point of telling them that Flappy Birds did not count as keyboarding practice. 

After lunch I was sent to help in 1st grade, but I couldn't find the teacher. I don't know where she went, but I had a nice walk around the building looking for her. After no success, I settled in Ms. Js class and did some stuff for her. I really like the 1st grade teachers. I finished up the day in a 3rd grade class.

I don't know if I'll get hired there for next year. I know I would like to, however, it all depends on who is staying and who is going. I think would be an effective TA with the younger age groups. I know I would be a good fit for 1st or 2nd grade, and maybe Kindergarten. 3rd grade was okay, but I didn't like it as much as I liked Kindergarten and 1st grade. 2nd could be fun because I would know what O was learning.  Oh well, I'll just wait and see.

These are just too good to wait

O Speaks

"Sometimes, I say words that don't make very much sense, but they are actually warnings".

"Whenever I hear a spanish word, I have to say it in a spanish accident".

"I'm upset about two things. One, I didn't get my mamas milk and two, I wasn't born in your uterus". We'd been talking about age, and when I met O in the hospital. 

"NO!!! Sharks, they'll kill you to death." Her response to the news that I want to do a Shark Adventure scuba trip.

Work

Even though I can be called in to work, I still volunteer in Os class and usually stay until the end of recess/playtime. After one particularly long stretch of cold weather, the wee ones were able to go outside. Within the first few minutes, there must have been 5 kids hurt running into each other, or falling, or getting scraped, or something. Now, when I go out with them, I wonder how many casualties there will be. It's entertaining, in a sick sort of way. It's kind of like counting road kill on a long drive. You just can't help it. That's not bad, right?

I worked for a few hours one morning in Ms. Sues class. She taught O last year and we LOOOOOOVE her. The class went on a field trip to a grocery store for a tour and to talk about nutrition. On the tour in the produce section, we were asked if we knew what "organic" meant. I was one of the few who raised a hand and was then "voluntold" to tell the others what it meant. In a part of my explanation I said "In order for the foods to be considered organic, they aren't allowed to be genetically modified". The adults laughed a bit. I didn't get why it was funny, I'm totally serious about this stuff. But in retrospect, it was probably because "genetically modified" are huge words.

At lunch time Ms. Sue let me know I was on lunch duty. WHAT?!?!? "Oh CRAP" was the first thing I thought. It didn't turn out to be the "crazy" I thought it would be, and I survived.

Costco is a happin' place for seniors around lunch time. I stopped by there on my way home from "work" and I swear I saw a round of "slow" speed dating going on in the food court. I think there was a line for the scooters too.

In order to complete my application process and be officially hired, I have to submit my college transcripts, and, I'm embarrassed. I was NEVER motivated by grades, it drove my parents NUTS, but, they weren't that important to me. I remember the first part of my senior year in high school I wanted to see what it was like to get straight A's. So I did at mid-sememster, and decided it wasn't a big deal or much fun, so I quit trying. That was the same attitude I had in college and NOW I have to submit my transcripts to a school district for employment. UGH!!! I hope I never meet the person who looks at my transcripts. I am SOOOOO embarrassed. 

Side Note: The only transcript I've had to submit to an organization in the past has been my massage therapy one for licensure. 

BoobTalk

My daughters obsession with teasing me by poking my boobs is getting worse, or she just likes to embarrass me. I was afraid this would happen, but her boob pokes have gone public. The first time she did it, we were walking from school to our car. Out of nowhere, and in front of other cars, there it was, a poke. I thought I was going to die of embarrassment. She's done it during recess at school too. I have to stand with my arms folded to protect myself. 

We went to dinner the other week and she crawled under the table. I saw this cute little hand slowly rise up on our side, then, she did it! She poked me, in public. I thought I was going to die, again. She quickly shot back to her side. The under-the-table poke is a new one. LT gets mad when he sees her do it, I think he's just jealous she gets more action than he does. :)

"Mom, fish are going to come in and try to touch your boobs because they look like seaweed". I have no idea where that came from. We were in the kitchen and I had successfully warded off an attack. AND, I'm VERY CONFIDENT my boobs DO NOT look like seaweed. 

Anxiety

I HATE my little, unwelcome friend. I've had some upsetting dreams recently. They are the kind that wake me up and I can't go back to sleep because I'm anxious. Anxiety SUCKS!!

SPRING!

My favorite season is almost here. Look who is trying to make an appearance.

Food

Check out this little goodie I found. It is organic and the ingredients are good too. For over 6 weeks, O has been a little turd about eating breakfast. I'm hoping the chocolate in this will motivate her to have something in the morning.

Our Anniversary 

I like the idea of doing a shark adventure dive on our trip. 

Here is the description; 

"This dive trip is divided into two separate stages: the wall dive and the shark feeding dive. The wall dive takes place in one of two dive sites: the Shark Wall or the Runway Wall. Both of these sites are fabulous undersea walls with a large vertical wall teeming with sea life, including plenty of Caribbean Reef Sharks. At these locations, no baiting or feeding will take place, so divers have the chance to view these remarkable creatures typical behavior. The sharks will maintain a comfortable distance on this fantastic free dive along the wall.

"After the dive along a wall, the dive party will descend to the sandy sea bottom at either the Arena or the Runway. Both of these locales have plenty of open space where neither the divers nor the sharks will feel confined. The shark feeders will then release bait with the use of a long spear, drawing the sharks around the dive party as they rest on the sandy floor. This immersive experience will definitely be the highlight of your Bahamas vacation.

tour highlights

• Dive with the Reef and Nurse Sharks off the coast of the Bahamas
• Dive with Controlled Feeding of Sharks

I've highlighted what excites me. Doesn't it sound so cool??? 

I can't think of anything creative to name this post

Quotes from the week

"I can't tolerate intolerance! I know, it's contradiction at its best".

"8 girls in my house tonight. Wish there was a Nascar speedway nearby where I could get some peace and quiet" Eric Forrest

"Are you crying"?

"Of course not! It's liquid pride, which is a totally different thing".

What O has to say

"You can always go window shooting", O offering an idea to us for our date.

Handicapped - Candy happed 

Shift - Shit

I was at a play date weeks ago and my friend said, "SHIT", and then apologized. O doesn't know that's not a nice word. LT and I realized, O doesn't really know any cuss words. We RARELY use them. She thinks "stupid", "hate", and "shut-up" and horrible, horrible things today. I've cleaned up my language when I'm driving in the car, however, I still call other drivers names. The other day she told on me to LT and said, "Mom said a bad word, she called another driver a MORON"!! I'm SO GLAD that is now the worst I say. 

Boob Talk

Della, - "Sarah, you're going to have to find a new best friend. Melissa is available".

Sarah - "Na, she doesn't have big enough boobs". 

Me - "I'm sure there is some sort of enhancement cream I could use".

Della, while transferring Sweet Baby Alice to me, thought she did a boob brush,"I"m sorry. Did I touch you"?

Me - "I don't know. Did you? I wear a padded bra".

I'm so immature. This picture is from the Baltimore Science Museum.

O LOVES having braids in her hair one day and then having the braid-wavy hair the next day. It just happened to be crazy hat day at school the same day as a braid day. She looked AWESOME in her rasta hat with her braids.

DBSA

I received the most kind compliment at the meeting Thursday night. We were getting ready to leave and I was talking with a lady who has come to several meetings. She said the nicest thing, it was very flattering and I said thank you. Then she looked in my eyes, and it was an intense look, and she said it again to make sure I got it, and repeated it one last time. Wow, I am so blessed to be a part of such a great group that helps people with issues that are near and dear to my heart. 

We had our last meeting at the library at the end of Feb. I am happy to start the next chapter of our little group. We now have a permanent home and a regular schedule. My favorite part of the meeting was the laughter we shared at the end.

Work

I was called in to help one morning last week and I was put in a Kindergarten class for a couple of hours. It was intimidating at first because.... it was a new experience. (When I am in Os class, I at least know the students and I'm comfortable with the teacher). Before class began, I introduced myself to a table of wee ones. The first thing a sweet little girl said to me was, "Oh, let me see your pretty earrings. Oh I like your smile, you have pretty glasses." Aw, that helped my jitters disappear. I loved her sincerity. 

Getting Smarter
Saturday morning, I went to this conference. I LOVED the presentation by Shauna King, M.Ed. She talked about basic brain anatomy and the differences between the genders. I was enthralled the entire time. I wish she could have spoken for a couple of hours. (I love anything anatomy/neurology related). It really helped me understand O, how she thinks and what is age appropriate. It also informed me about what to expect as she matures. The differences between boys and girls was amusing. I want to learn more about this topic.