Heavy Heart

Two things are weighing on my heart, the first has to do with my daughter and the second has to do with a dear, dear friend of mine.

To begin, O frequently tells me she doesn't have any friends at school. Anytime she is having a meltdown, that surfaces. I know it is stressing her out and I know she wants friends. She can play with A and J for hours without an issue. She is an intense kid and can overwhelm others and I think that gets in the way. She's been bullied on the bus. The first time it happened, I wasn't too sure of the story, but the second time it happened I filed a report right away. The school called me that day and let me know what was done to resolve it. 

I see her when I volunteer and some of the kids are pretty mean to her. I set up some play dates to help out. The first one ended early. B wanted to go home after an hour. The following day at school, she told O she never wanted to have a play date again. (I talked to her dad about it and all he knew from B was that they fought over a toy or something). We had a play date with one of her friends from Kindergarten and it went well, her friend didn't want to go home. When her friend did leave, O said, "Please don't run away from me at school." My heart broke. My wonderful girl is being overlooked.

I wish so badly this wasn't happening to her. I know she will have to navigate the social ups and downs of life, but I just didn't expect it to start so early. I worry the most about her self-esteem. She is an amazing girl and I don't want the actions and words of others to send the message that she is anything else. LT and I are being pretty deliberate with spending time as a family and trying to make our home a secure and happy place. I know we can't change how others will treat her, but if she is at least loved completely at home, she can know for herself she is just fine. 

The second thing that is weighing on me is the news that my Ladybug has leukemia. She has a lot of fight in her and I know she won't give up. AND, I'm sad to know she's going to have a tough and miserable battle. I've known her for about 20 years. I worked with her daughter at Oakcrest. We hiked Timpanogos and I thought she was going to die sliding down the glacier. When a serious, long-term relationship of mine ended, she was there to listen. There is a special little place in my heart that belongs only to her. I just love this woman. I can't imagine her... gone.